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zaphodB

Member Since 03 Dec 2006
Offline Last Active Mar 01 2012 12:40 AM

Topics I've Started

Why I Love Nerf

19 February 2010 - 09:45 PM

I feel like this little piece needs some background. I may not have been a part of the community since it's inception, but I grew up in the 90's, the heyday of nerf. My parents were fairly liberal, particularly when it came to guns. My mom was from boston, so she wanted nothing to do with them. In fact, I had no toy weapons at all growing up, until such time that I could construct them on my own out of legos. So it was a magical moment for me that, one christmas eve at a cousin's house, I discovered a chainblazer. It jammed, and only had a few darts, and was noisy and probably broken, but to me, it was awesome.

It woke something in me. I became enamored with projectiles. All through my childhood I build bows, blowguns, marble launchers, and absurd paper airplanes. It wasn't the killing aspect that intrigued me. Rather, it was the mystery, almost the magic of sending an object flying away from me in a predictable manner. Even when I was building bows and making arrows out of honeysuckle shoots, it was never with the intent to hurt anything. It was some elusive skill that I wanted to have.

As I grew older, the desire stayed with me. But the rules my parents set up for me were still in effect. They didn't have a problem with me making things, but purchasing a firearm, even a toy one as innocuous as a nerf gun, paralleled in their minds to hero-worshiping murder. It was after I could drive, and after I had already mastered a blowgun that shot 6 inch steel needles at ludicrous speeds, that I finally worked up the courage to sneak home a nerf gun. It was a maverick.

It wasn't anything special. It had the same problems all mavericks do. It jammed. It was weak. You couldn't put tagger darts in it. It was noisy. But I loved the damn thing because it was the next step for me and my understanding of projectiles. I hid that gun from my mother for months, and when she finally found out about it, she was legitimately angry with me. I couldn't explain the projectile thing to her, so I made up some story about modifying it as practice for becoming an engineer.

So, I arrived here. It was the end of 2006, I think, so right at the beginning of the n-strike line. Modifications were different then. FA_24 and Slug were both regular member, albeit talented modders. But by and large, the hobby was still mostly held together with duck tape and hot glue. My first few modifications were almost on the razor's edge of advancement; I was one of the first people to add a dtg to a longshot. I'm not here to brag. That was the only modification I was ever really proud of, and it wasn't even that good.

But I think the fact that I'm not proud of any of my modifications is worth looking at, because it speaks to something that has gone sour in this community. Somewhere along the line, we stopped being a website of people celebrating the simple and childish fun of pelting each other with silly plastic toys, and changed into some sort of mutant connoisseurs of hasbros products. We're nerf HIPSTERS now, for christ sakes. We put on our ray-ban glasses and ironic flannel vests, pour ourselves into skin tight jeans and purple all-stars and say things like "the vulcan? Sure, it's an interesting gun cosmetically, but the lack of modification potential makes it, at best, a substandard gun practicality-wise, especially when it's weight and battery power are taken into account."...

Really, guys? Really? It's a fucking toy belt fed machine gun! It holds 25 darts, and shoots them at the push of a button, pelting your little brother, your cat, your mom, your dog, and your goldfish with foam darts all without having to reload! At what point did we decide that that wasn't FUCKING AWESOME?

We've lost our souls. We're turning this hobby into a series of highly competitive battles with modification based cock-waving in between. We demand excellence and optimization in a hobby that is inherently ridiculous and haphazard! There's nothing wrong with creating a highly efficient, accurate blaster. The Doomsayer and the +bow, to name a couple, are works of art in their design and their effectiveness. But we are too quick to make those blasters the standard by which we judge other modifications.

I think it's time to be a little less elitist. So, for me, this is an all inclusive salute to all the guns that we all labeled as shitty. All the duct tape and marker guns. All the sticky black paint job guns. All the ball guns and converted super soaker guns and made-out-of-wood guns. Because before the topic for each of these guns was posted, the person behind them was proud. Lets remember where we came from. Whether your modifications are for form or function, remember that the most important is fun. Don't let anyone else's retarded concept of good mar your own.

Dr. Horrible's Sing-along Blog

10 August 2008 - 08:57 PM

I usually try not to start new topics, but I haven't seen anything about this here, and I think there'll be some appreciation for it. Without further ado I present Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog Enjoy.

Bfg

23 July 2008 - 04:38 PM

So I decided to make something a bit more fun. I don't really see this getting any application in a war, although if you have any add on barrels for a shotgun effect, that should work out. My thought process went something like this: Hey, I haven't messed around with my nerf guns in a while... I don't really want to buy a new one, so what do I have lying around I can play with... Hey, my maverick got painted shut before I could do a barrel replacement, and i have an extra titan around... Wow, the titan tank fits almost perfectly into where the mav barrels were... let's get this show on the road. And then I got the show on the road. There isn't much to this, other than cutting a few things. Without further ado, I give you the big fucking gun.

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apologies for the crappy pictures, my camera is my cellphone pretty much until I'm out of college.

Camping

24 June 2008 - 06:39 PM

Here's my reply to the topic, hopefully it's useful.

Depends. If you're actually camping (fire, all that) you'll find a few things indispensable. I'll make a list of ten things I never leave without, and you can decide how many will be useful.

1. A hatchet. Good for pounding in tent stakes, getting firewood, marshmallow sticks, and other heavy chopping.

2. Pocketknife. There's all sorts of things that need to be cut at a campsite, and what you can't cut with a hatchet, you'll want to cut with a knife. They're also nice for making walking sticks. don't get a leatherman type thing, they're more trouble then they're worth. I have a SOG Twitch II, and it's served me very well.

3. Parachute string. basically really strong nylon twine. It's good for hanging towels on, and hoisting food up into trees so animals don't get at it. Also, you never know when you need string.

4. Gatorade powder (just add water). You don't know what kind of water the campsite you're on will have. The powder won't make it any cleaner, but it will make it taste a lot better. I just realized that this was a vital item a few years ago, and it has made camping so much better for me. If you bring nothing else, pack this.

5. A good cooler/water bottle. Again, water is very important, it's probably going to be hot where you are, and you'll want cold water. That cuts out nalgenes, no matter how trendy they are. Get something insulated. This also means you'll need to find out where to get ice. Most campsites have places where you can buy it for cheap.

6. Flashlight. You ever try to find the toilet at night when the power's out at your house? Imagine that but with bears. You'll want a flashlight. I use a Maglite, with an incandescent bulb (some people swear by LEDs, but i don't think it lights stuff as well. I know it's technically brighter, but it's a blue light, and it's h ard to see with)

7. Food/pots and pans) You wouldn't think this would be important, but you don't want to eat coldcuts all the time. Bring some stuff you can cook. (hot dogs, pasta, pancake mix, eggs) as well as breads. You won't be able to find much on a campsite. Mostly gas station food, and that's only sometimes.

8. A good pillow. It doesn't entirely make up for the fact that you're sleeping on the ground, but comfort goes a long way towards being able to wake up and have fun the next day.

9. Extra towel. You don't know what's going to happen between the two times you go swimming. An extra towel is a good idea.

10. Bear mace. Just kidding. Bears are more afraid of you than you are of them. And if they're not, there isn't much you can do about it. have fun.

-edit- oh yeah, and matches. Get strike anywhere matches if you can, so if the box gets damp you can still use them.

Modifications

10 May 2008 - 02:39 PM

On the main page there is a link marked "modifications". The modifications on it are pretty old, and I was wondering if it's function has been replaced by Forsaken's modifications topic. It if has, I would suggest an edit to the topic to include a link to the sticky. Otherwise, the function of that link in extremely outdated.