Community Status Updates
cmeej → KoRnEd
A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responds, ''But they are twins. If you...
Feb 08 2012 01:08 AM
cmeej → KoRnEd
My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.
Feb 08 2012 01:08 AM
cmeej → KoRnEd
I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'Have you got anything for wind?' So he gave me a kite.
Feb 08 2012 01:08 AM
cmeej → KoRnEd
A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says: ''Pint please, and one for the road.''
Feb 08 2012 01:07 AM
cmeej → KoRnEd
Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one - and let the other one off.
Feb 08 2012 01:07 AM
cmeej → KoRnEd
A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself. Hysterically the blonde responds to the husband, '...
Feb 08 2012 01:07 AM
cmeej → KoRnEd
'I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''
Feb 08 2012 01:06 AM
cmeej → KoRnEd
A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: ''The driver just insulted me!'' The man says: ''You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you.''
Feb 08 2012 01:06 AM